Effect of media on teenagers about dating
It feels like the opposite of being loved, but in fact, these isolated, self-hating moments are the start of love.
These feelings are what will, one day, be at the bedrock of the ecstasy we’ll feel in the presence of that rare partner who can accept and desire us back.
Therefore, as a child develops into an adult, the chances of those around them exactly sympathising with and swiftly grasping their inner condition necessarily decreases sharply.
The first response of the teenager is to think themselves uniquely cursed.
And, of course, one’s parents really are rather annoying in many ways. We would never leave home and become parents ourselves if we weren’t at some level compensating for the problems, mistakes and vices we had first identified in our own parents at fourteen and a half. Lastly, and most poignantly, teenagers tend to hate themselves.
Secondly, to greater efforts to make oneself understood.
It isn’t a sign that something has gone wrong, it’s evidence that the child knows they are loved.
The really worrying teenagers aren’t those who misbehave around their parents and take out their random misery upon them, it’s those who are so worried about not being loved, they can’t afford to put a foot wrong.
The real distinction is between suffering with a purpose and suffering in vain.
For all the horrors of adolescence, one of its glories is that the suffering it inflicts is largely securely rooted in some of the most crucial developments and realisations of adulthood.
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